It comes as surprising news to us to hear that one of our own, Brent Lannister (no relation), was taken prisoner by the IOC while trying to release the world leaders and diety Pele from the VIP box in Maracana Stadium. This will not stand, and we ask that all citizens be on the lookout for Brent Lannister:
Natural green hair
Two different naturally colored eyes (one pink, one white)
In the meantime, we are taking legal action against the IOC. We look forward to what may be a gold medal for us in the Olympic Sport of Law.
The games are only just beginning.
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